Frustration

History is repeating itself and this reminded me of not too long ago ? on my birthday!!!

Even though my son is close to 13 years old, I have never felt that he is ready to be left alone at home. His maturity hasn't reached that level that I don't have to worry.

As for my daughter, she is bold. Thus I am even more worried that she will game for anything dangerous.

Though I have a helper, for the past three months, she has not demonstrated to me that I can entrust her with the safety of my children. Partly because once she told me that my son is old enough to look after himself.

Furthermore, from the past weeks, she has been napping at ridiculous hours and I am really concerned about this. I can proudly say that I didn?t torture her with tons of housework. In fact, I think she thinks she has nothing to do and is bored till she sees stars.

Yes, this week was supposed to be a merry week. I was planning for a mid week tea with a friend and a TGIF dinner cum drink with two friends that I haven't catch up for the longest time.

When I stay out in the night, I needed my hubby to stay in so that he can keep an eye on the kids. As usual, all plans were arranged with him last week and again he is NOT HONOURING it.

It seems so easy to say that ?the kids can mind themselves?.

I am staying on the highest floor with no safety grill!

Call me paranoid, but I am definitely not ready to live with regrets should anything happened!

I am sick of the same old reason and I know it will never change till my kids are really old enough to look after themselves.

To ease my frustration, I am going to see whether baking can help me to ease some of my anger.

I must channel my energy to something positive?.

Tomorrow, my classmate J will be coming for tea with her little princess. It was an overdue date as last week my little one was down with fever.

So today, I decided to bake her some Blueberry Crumble Muffins from Okashi as I will be too busy making a fondant cake for her tomorrow morning.

Once again, these didn't disappoint me. I have tweaked the recipe a little, substituted hazelnut meal instead of almond meal.



Stay tuned as I present my Chocolate Mud Cake tomorrow.

Recipe adapted from Okashi, Keiko Ishida

What you need:

20g unsalted butter, softened
20g castor sugar
20g sifted cake flour
10g hazelnut meal

120g cake flour
1 tsp baking powder
100g frozen blueberries
50g unsalted butter, softened
40g brown sugar
30g castor sugar
1 egg
60g cold milk

Method

Combine crumble ingredients in a bowl and rub in gently to create crumbs. Chill till further use.

Preheat oven to 180 degree.

Cream butter till soft and add in sugars and beat till light and fluffy. Add egg and beat till combined.

Add a third of the flour and fold in. Add half of the milk and continue alternate with flour and milk. Last addition is flour. Fold in gently.

Add in frozen blueberries. Fold gently.

Do not over mixed.

Scoop into prepared muffin tray. Top off with crumble.

Baked for 15 - 20 min or till crumble starts to brown.