Karen Getting Married

Good day and Sita Ram!  That’s a Hindu greeting I learned this weekend in Trinidad.  In fact, I learned a lot of things this weekend, most of them having to do with the incredible hospitality of the people of Trinidad.  I’ve always thought Southerners had a lock on first place in that area.  But after the past weekend, I can attest we’ve got some serious competition from the Trinis.  I don’t believe I’ve been welcomed so warmly in my life.  Ever.  Audrey and I were greeted with open arms, hugged by total strangers, chauffeured around the island, shown the sights, fed incredibly well and dressed in Indian clothing.  They were even pleasant in immigration and customs.

We were in Trinidad to celebrate the marriage of Devica’s elder daughter, Karen, to Shiva Sahadeo Nanan.  Karen and Shiva were married on Sunday in Esperance, outside San Fernando.  It was our first Indian wedding and our first Hindu wedding and all I can say is…wow.  Big wow!  The weekend was a mash up of electric colors and beating drums, fragrant with incense and curry, warmed by the glow of true love.

We attended the ladies only Maticor procession and Hardi ceremony on Friday (which was also Karen’s birthday) and then it was lunchtime.  I love lunchtime.  In keeping with Hindu tradition, the immediate family was fasting - no meat, fowl, fish or alcohol until after the wedding.  Lunch was channa, pumpkin, saheena (dasheen and yellow split pea roll), mango talkari, rice, dhal and buss up shut.  It was all accompanied by mother-in-law, a spicy relish of finely diced carrots, caraili (bitter gourd) and scotch bonnet peppers flavored with a good hit of lime juice.  I am now officially addicted to mother-in-law and very upset with Devica for not having shared this fresh, incendiary concoction with me sooner.

There were no plates or utensils on the lunch table.  Instead, lunch was served using soharee leaves for plates (similar in size and shape to banana leaves, but much sturdier) and hands work just as well as forks for getting food where it needs to go.  And recipes?  I have a recipe for buss up shut here.  The ones served in Trinidad, both at this lunch and at the wedding, were much larger, soft and white (no brown patches like we do them at home).  As for the other dishes, Devica returns from Trinidad next week and as soon as she’s recovered, I promise I’ll get working with her on some recipes for posting.

Friday evening I went to Shiva’s house to hear the tassa (drums) while Audrey hung out with the girls.  The beating of the tassa seems to be code for “let’s get this party started!”  Saturday was a mad dash to High Street in San Fernando to find Indian clothing to wear to the wedding.  An hour later we were fully outfitted head to toe…from bindis to bangles, shalwar kameez to sandals.

Saturday night was Cooking Night and the parching of the laawa (rice paddy).  The rice was stirred in a pot over a fire until it popped and opened, looking and smelling a little like popcorn.  The parched laawa was then put away to be used at the wedding ceremony.  After the laawa was parched, there was more tassa and dancing.  Afterwards, Audrey stayed for a sleepover with Devica’s daughters and nieces, I went back to the hotel for some sleep (wimp), and everybody else partied till about 4:30 in the morning, somehow managing to look fresh and well-rested the next morning for the wedding.

The wedding took place at the Hindu temple, where the marriage was blessed by the pundit and the Dulaha and Dulahin (bride and groom) became husband and wife.  I cried, of course.  I always cry at weddings.  After the wedding, we drove under ominously dark clouds through the driving rain to Shiva’s house for the reception, where the sun was shining and it was perfectly dry, in more ways than one.  There was plenty of icy bottled water and Chubby soda on offer, but if you needed something a little stronger to carry you through the night, the men had that covered.  Both sides of the street were lined with cars, trunks popped open, coolers full of beer, wine and spirits.  Kind of a Trini wedding tailgate.  There was plenty of tassa (party time!), Indian dancing, toasts to the couple, the cake was cut (a fruitcake I think).  Shiva played the tassa and also sang sweetly to his new bride.

The wedding dinner was another amazing vegetarian spread, including plenty of mother-in-law for us addicts.  Dinner was served on two long tables set under a tent next door at Shiva’s neighbor’s house.  You took a seat at the table, a soharee leaf was placed before you and a crew of servers came around dishing up the dinner.  After eating, we just folded up our leaves and threw them in the trash, leaving the seat for the next hungry guest.  It was a fantastic way to efficiently feed about three or four hundred guests at two tables seating about sixteen people each (basically everybody in the village shows up at the reception to wish the newlyweds well and join the party).  And no washing up!

It was a fantastic party that Audrey and I had to leave much too soon since we had an early flight on Monday morning.  Wish we could have hung with the Trinis and partied all night.  We had an amazing weekend and I have to say thank you again to everyone for their extraordinary hospitality.  Thank you to Karen and Shiva for including us in the celebration of your marriage; I know that you’ll have a long and happy life together.  Your wedding was the experience of a lifetime that Audrey and I will never forget.  Namaste.

* While Devica and I are working on our Indian vegetarian recipes, you might want to check out a few of my blogging friends who write about the foods of Trinidad and Tobago.  Some great reads and recipes can be found at Lifespan of a Chennette, TriniGourmet, Simply Trini Cooking, Caribbean Pot and Macafouchette.

** You can find a good description of the different components of a traditional Trinidadian Hindu wedding here.