What is Love?

After the sterility of Swiss life for a few forgetful months ** disclaimer - not all Swiss are unfriendly ** I learned that making new friends when you are a little longer in the tooth is not as easy as it used to be, or maybe I am not as willing to work as hard at relationship building as I used to be?



When children enter into your life (no matter how they arrive on your doorstep or for how long) your capacity to love changes dramatically. What started out as a 'tight - twosome' grows into a 'messy menage a trois' with that extra body sleeping with you and your partner. In a lot of relationships this causes quite a bit of stress. The mother stops catering to the needs of a neglected husband and the child (rightly so) gets all the love and attention. I am not sure why but our little 'bed buddy' did not mess things up at all. She fit right in and it worked for us (first time around!)



Then because 'things have changed' you have to work sooooooooooo much harder at the relationship. The little ones - well that is the easy part. "Feed them, Love them, Watch them grow". For quite sometime I mourned the loss of life with my lover because I knew those days were gone and would never ever return. What I did not know then and I very much know now is that if you keep feeding the relationship it grows in a different way. Because we had a decent root system (many years of togetherness before babies - thank God) Love gets so much deeper. The bonding of babydom passes and every learns how to wipe their own bums (yeah!). Then teeny tiny moments of time return to grown ups which we greedily grab.