Behind every Christmas menu is a hidden psychological need that no one wants to admit
Everything has to be special at Christmas: the house, the gifts, the table... and of course the dishes we serve. Yet behind the rush to elaborate recipes and spectacular menus lies a surprisingly widespread psychological dynamic: the fear of the "too simple" dish.
A Christmas pressure that has less to do with the cuisine itself than with expectations, social comparison, and the need to feel up to par. According to several psychologists, including Daniel Kahneman, Abraham Maslow, and psychological consultant specializing in eating behavior Susan Albers, what drives us is a mix of the need for approval, perfectionism, and social influence.
But does a simple dish really mean little effort? And why at Christmas do we feel compelled to impress even when we don't feel like it? Let's see what psychology reveals.
Why do we fear presenting simple dishes? The role of social expectations
The deeper root of this fear emerges from the group's expectations. Christmas lunch is not just another meal: it is a true collective ritual, loaded with family, cultural and emotional meanings. As Maslow reminds us, it responds to our need for belonging and recognition, two needs that become even more intense during the holidays.
When we cook for a lot of people, especially if they are relatives, social conformity comes into play, a psychological mechanism that pushes us to want to prove ourselves to the tradition and expectations of others. And it is precisely in this context that even the best but simple dishes begin to seem insufficient or unfestive to us, as if they are not enough to merit the Christmas table.
The effect of social: the tyranny of perfect aesthetics
According to analysis from platforms such as Pinterest, TikTok, and Instagram (Pinterest Predicts and Food Trends Report data), December is the month when searches related to "layouts", "holiday tables" and "scenic recipes" reach an annual peak.
Psychologists speak of "comparison trap": we see perfect, glossy, geometric, glitter-filled menus online, and the automatism kicks in:
"If I don't amaze, I look lazy. If I make it too simple, I'm not worth enough."
Psychologist Daniel Kahneman would call it a form of cognitive bias, an error in thinking: we confuse complexity with value.
Fear of judgment: why cooking becomes a performance
For many people, cooking for Christmas almost becomes a public rehearsal. The table looks like a stage, the food a spectacle, and those who prepare the menu fear the judgment of perceived harsh guests.
According to psychologist Susan Albers, an expert on mindful eating, this feeling is linked to food perfectionism, a mental mechanism that leads us to believe that:
- every dish must be flawless
- complexity shows commitment and dedication
- simplicity is a sign of lack of care or love
Basically, we fear that a dish that is too simple will send the wrong message, as if it is not enough for a special occasion like Christmas.
The paradox of simplicity: when essential cooking is a value
The point is that simplicity is not superficiality. Many Italian Christmas culinary traditions, such as broth, homemade pasta, or baked fish, arise precisely from the logic of essentiality.
Great contemporary chefs, from Massimo Bottura to Yotam Ottolenghi, often speak of "intentional simplicity", an approach of choosing a few quality ingredients and making the most of them. It is not poverty. It is expertise, awareness and respect for the product.
The aesthetic aspect: when little is enough to make a scene
One of the most common fears is that a simple dish is not "Instagrammable" enough. In fact, visual psychology suggests otherwise. According to the theory of aesthetic coherence, clean, uncluttered and minimal images often turn out to be more elegant and satisfying.
This means that to look good, you don't need to complicate. A few simple principles suffice:
- clear dishes communicate freshness
- color contrast increases the perception of desirability
- an orderly presentation reduces judgment anxiety
When detailed, simplicity becomes an aesthetically powerful choice.
The theme of saving money: why do we feel guilty about spending less?
One of the most obvious contradictions of Christmas is the idea that to make a good impression it is necessary to spend a lot. This belief stems from a psychological dynamic called demonstrative waste, described by Thorstein Veblen's theory. According to this mechanism, the more we invest in a dish or menu, the more we communicate value and commitment.
Yet data from the Waste Watcher Observatory show that at Christmas, food waste increases by up to 25 percent compared to the rest of the year.
Therefore, choosing simple and smart dishes becomes not only an emotional choice, but also an ethical and economic decision.
How to overcome the fear of the simple dish: 4 psychological tips
1. Scale back expectations
Remember what Maslow suggests: a sense of belonging comes from people, not from the complexity of dishes.
2. Focus on quality, not quantity
Good ingredients + proper execution always trumps complicated recipe.
3. Take care of the plating
A few gestures: order, cleanliness, contrast. They always work.
4. Value your time
A simple dish gives you extra hours to devote to what really matters.
Simplicity as the true luxury of the holidays
The fear of the too-simple dish stems from expectations, comparisons, and pressures that have little to do with authentic cooking. At Christmas, it is not necessary to impress at all costs. What really matters is sharing. Simplicity is not an afterthought, but a conscious choice that brings together psychology, aesthetics, and attention to savings. And it is often the most basic dishes that give us back the true spirit of the holidays.
In your opinion, does this reflection reflect what you also experience at Christmas?
Daniele Mainieri
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