Vegan Matzo Brie (or, for my Shiksas, Vegan Fried Matzo and Scrambled "Eggs")

Blog Readers:
I rarely ask favors. I don't really find it in true Blogger nature to request something in a forum that's typically suited for leisure. But! Just yesterday, I finished the first draft of my cookbook. I need help with two things:

1) I need readers. You don't have to read the whole thing...If enough people are interested, I'll break it up into sections. In my mind, it should be written in a manner that's easy for home cooks to understand. I did my best to break every recipe down...explaining the shortcuts you can take to simplify my often complex recipes.

If you're interested, drop me an email at VeganizeIt@gmail.com

2) If you live in the state of California, PLEASE do whatever you can, when possible, to help support the overturn of Prop 8. The longer time passes without my ability to wed, the more Vegan Food I eat, therefor requiring me to have the seams let out on my wedding dress. Help us obtain our Constitutional Rights before my inescapable Jewish Middle-Aged Spread hits.

Ok. 'Nuff said.

Growing up, I didn't really like Matzo. I dreaded the arrival of Pesach, fully knowing that the Matzo Curse was about to rear it's ugly head in the Shagrin Household. "Curse?!" You ask.

Yes.

When it was the time of the Jew Year when leavened bread products could not be consumed, all chaos broke loose. My mother, typically the sweetest, strongest woman I know, would be stricken with Matzoitis. It's a condition that affects the lower digestive organs, plugging her up in the worst way possible. She would try so hard to make it through the duration of the holiday without yeast-risen products. The Matzo would continue to accumulate in her lower organs, forcing all of her tension and anxiety to explode from her top. And something not so nose-friendly to explode from elsewhere.

My sister and I, two of the biggest food lovers I know, had to start off our day with a Pesach Approved version of Fruit Loops. They tasted something akin to pureed cardboard, Elmer's glue and artificial Prune extract. I don't know if it's what's in the cereal that made us so crabtastic, or our bodies experiencing deep sugar withdrawal without our Frosted Flakes. But I do know that no one in temple sat within a 5-foot-radius of our family.

And Daddy Shags? Smart man. Avoided the whole damn situation by escaping to his friends house to play poker and down some Jew Brews.

Okay. So perhaps I embellished slightly. Very slightly. But I still could rarely get into Matzo. The only time I remember thinking "Wow. Yum." after taking a bite is when my Nanny or Mom would cook Matzo Brie aka Fried Matzo. Traditionally, it's Matzo scalded with hot water, dipped in beaten eggs and pan fried. Some like it savory, some like it sweet. If your sweet tooth is larger than mine, add a little sugar at the end.



Matzo Brie

4 pieces Matzo
3-4 cups Water2 1/2 cups Basic Vegan Scrambled "Egg" Mix1-2 TBSP Vegan Margarine, for frying
Salt and Pepper, to taste
Break up the Matzo into about 2-3 inch size pieces, then place in a colander.

Bring the Water to a boil.

Melt the Vegan Margarine in a large skillet over medium heat.

Once the Margarine has melted, Brie (scald) the Matzo by pouring boiling water over them, then draining as quickly as possible to prevent sogginess. Quickly mix with the Scrambled "Eggs", and cook over low to medium heat until golden brown on one side, then flip over and brown the other side.

Taste for Salt and Pepper, then serve immediately.